A Waste of Suffering

I got teased a lot growing up.  My mom died when I was 4 ½ and I was raised by a step mother who didn’t seem to care very much for me and because of this, things happened that aided in this constant teasing.  There were MANY instances but a few really stuck with me.  When I was in third grade, a bunch of boys at recess teased me mercilessly about the bruises that were on the back of my legs.  When I was in 5^th grade, my hair got cut REALLY short and so I was called “butch” the whole year.  When I was in high school, I had to wear a dress half of the time which it was NOT even cool to wear a dress AT ALL!  There were three girls who relentlessly teased me, even shouting down the long hallway of the high school…with all the doors of the class rooms open… “Sandie Scholer is wearing a dress again today!” 

 I have often wondered what kind of a person does this.  Well, I am not sure.  But what I do know is, unless they are totally heartless, if they had for just one mature moment put themselves in the other person’s shoes, they would have thought twice before teasing or making fun.  If those boys had really thought about what I had gone through to get those bruises, maybe they would have wanted to befriend me instead of ridicule.  Believe me, I hated my hair short and I hated to wear clothes that made me not fit in.  It wasn’t my fault and it was adding insult to injury.

What is our character? Is our first reaction to make fun or be critical or judgmental or is it to be sensitive and have compassion?  For instance, who are we to judge and make fun of people who are obese?  We don’t know why they are in that situation and don’t you think that they spend every day of their lives hating it?  We should feel compassion for them, not make fun.  Maybe our love will help them feel better about themselves and benefit them in the long run.

I have discovered that we are given trials and challenges to give us perspective.   I was given the “opportunity” to have my wisdom teeth come in at the same time my baby son was teething.  Instead of being upset that he was crying so much, I felt compassion and wanted to comfort him more.  Because of my childhood “opportunities” in my life, I have recognized children who have been abused or neglected or unloved.  A hug and an “I love you” go a long way!  People just need to know that others care and accept them for who they are no matter their circumstances.

I think about my childhood and challenges in my life and think how easy it would be to be bitter. A lot of people are. I personally think it is a waste of suffering to not use them for good and see them as "opportunities" to make the world a better place!